A downloadable visual novel for Windows.
Wow. This was short but enjoyable. I really liked the way the visuals (e.g. the contrast between the blue/red, and how the sprites progressively changed) were presented at the end; that was very effective at getting across the suspense and tension that was occurring in those last moments.
The opening, narrative catchlines/pitch-points was hooking, as it implied a false sense of security and then foreshadows the eventual descending/descension plot the reader has yet to read. I also liked the flawed, believable characters. This story contained a good beginning/middle/end that didn't outstay it's welcome. It felt like just the right length. For the length of this descension story, it was wrapped up nicely (as in: nothing was left unsaid). And I enjoyed the experience a lot. I could really feel the tension at the end when Rolan recognized the two individuals he had seen earlier in the story, and then given the 'trial' by the Commander. I really felt for the characters and felt the sadness when Mark was forced (by the villain) to do a regrettably bad thing to his best friend.
Everything mentioned in the story ended up being important. Such as the letter written by his father, who disappeared abruptly from the MC, Rolan's life. And the established norm of the relationship between Rolan and Mark, as well as Suzie, and their overall closeness (and how important Suzie was to Mark), plus the current state of things before things took a turn for the worse. Plus, the hint to the characters' freedom being contained by the "barbed fences" going up in areas they previously roamed freely; an indicator of the oppression going on. I enjoyed reading the banter; it was warm and gave me a good sense of how close everybody was. The fourth-wall break (where the characters seemed self-aware about it being a VN and that Rolan's name changed to Ace) was also amusing. The MC Rolan seemed fond and impressed by Mark (the fact he got into the academy by winging it), however once you got to the end, it was quite shocking because Rolan's impression of him didn't quite match his beliefs based on how warm/friendly Mark appeared (or perhaps didn't live up to his expectations of who he thought Mark was).
The foreshadowing of things being amiss at the start was well-done. The radio felt very canned and rigged (very fitting for this wartime setting), overly patriotic & scripted, and presented a reality that wasn't true. Plus, the mention of a 'trial' foreshadowed the later events to come. Not to mention, Mark picked up on the fact that Rolan was bothered by 'something' (at that point in time during the story, though... not even he knew exactly what that was yet). I liked how the MC's skepticism was apparent right in the beginning, like tutting at the radio about it being tasteless after the Kaizer broadcast ended. The MC Rolan was written really well, he felt very human; I liked his candidness & kindness. Mark thought Rolan was aimless by not knowing what he wanted to do, but in the end, that trait helped him to not be easily controllable, and he became very decided in his actions when it came to moral choices. He felt very noble in the way that he stuck to his belief that what the villain was doing was flat-out wrong. Because of the sad ending, the relationship between Rolan and his best friend Mark really left an impression on me. Despite Mark deciding to go along with the villain, the contrast between him having a conscience & guilt for his actions, and the villain having none was interesting. Obviously the worst character in this is the Commander, who came off as very fake/insincere and a narcissist, and all those who just blindly believed him without any careful thought, or consideration of what was really going on around them. Despite hating the villain, he was written well. The villain's words were like literal barbed wire, it was filled with insincerity and was overly exaggerated and not painting a real picture of anything natural, normal, and correct. He was making such rash decisions just based on quickly-made assumptions about groups of people he barely knew. Plus, his lack of fact-checking whether the people he accused were truly evil people, or not, was barbaric. I definitely wasn't meant to like him, though, of course. Lol. What the believers were chanting was eerie... and it was creepy how there was mention in the chant that they were like a flock of sheep (which were being shepherded only by select individuals), and the proclamation of the villain's goal for submission (to his dictatorship), plus a veiled threat of punishment. To have included that in the chant is neat.
Also, kudos to the fact that you coded an entire engine in Python yourself. I'm impressed. There's definitely a lot of effort and time that was involved in making this. You really nailed the narration and story. The plot felt like it was planned carefully in advance (possibly even before you started writing--or at least, some things may have been).
Thank you for creating this. Wonderful narrative and a good example of a descension plot with slight bittersweet elements.
