I don't think I understand what you mean by 'force'. You can pretty much always decline. You can also set the gender of NPCs that play a certain role in the storyline. Also, it may be because you have the default, or 'ochre' world spawn. It's the basic one and it's pretty much all the same, though some special NPCs can change in different saves. You can type anything there and it will generate a random world, and then the customization for the spawn rates should work. (I haven't tried this so I may be wrong, but that's what I believe would happen). Also, you're welcome!
Some random events like being too popular, and like gaming contest event have like punishment system where you can choose to sex or not and you get worse punishment like losing money if you dont accept sex, that's like forcing stuff. In those event, it has chance can generate random gender which that I dont want to see those kinks.
Oh, well, in that case, you may be able to turn it off in the settings menu. I haven't really tried since I've managed to avoid it. For the losing money thing, if you have a high enough physical/assertiveness level then you should be able to avoid it. Again, I've never tried this, but this is what I believe should work.