Congratulations, HAndLol, you've successfully created the worst game in the jam! You should be... proud, I guess? And probably a little ashamed as well. ;P
The changes for future jams sound like a good idea to me- Misinterpreting the theme can be kind of impossible depending on the theme and what you're trying to do, and an explicit category for the awfulness of controls would be nice. It would also help clarify that the game shouldn't be completely impossible to play. I don't know if more time is necessary, but I certainly don't think an extra day would hurt- I image it would mostly give latecomers a better chance, like you said.
Overall, I had a lot of fun, and I'm looking forward to the next one!