The first rounds are difficult, but if you focus on getting your character to be more aggressive, your attack points will go up. If your attack is higher than their defence, you're lance will break, scoring you a point. If you're attack is much higher than theirs, you will unseat them. Otherwise, you may just injure them. Over all this is a great game, and I really hope it will be updated to include all the other gamemodes.
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Thank you for the comment. I think the game is fun and I do plan to get back to working on it. Life and stuff happened so it has been delayed. I have some ideas for some slight changes to how the game operates. The core will still be there but there might be some visual changes that I implement.
I definitely want to do the different game modes and add progression for your character. Getting new armor, horses, and training to increase skills will really enhance the game I feel. Then there is some of the other stuff I have considered like magic items to help you improve as well. Enchanted armor and stuff like that. Of course you will compete against others similarly equipped but it is a way to add some other layers of tactics.