Okay, so, guess it's time for another looooong feedback about the last chapter, hm? Caribdis, don't hesitate to tell me if that's useful or not, there's probably no point for me to continue posting these if you don't even read them! :-þ And for any other people here: warning, I'll do my best to remain just blurry enough, but the following line will probably contains spoilers anyway.
So, let's start just before the beginning of the eighth chapter to say I still think the end of the seventh was unnecessary violent against the player, especially autistic ones like me. Please do not do something like that again (I'll talk about cliffhangers again at the end of this feedback, of course). Consequently, not sure about the very first cops scene, guess that's a way to come back to the story after the months-long break, but could still be a bit long between the highly stressing scene and the continuation. But I guess people who'll discover the story with the eighth chapter in it will tell.
And so, interesting way to solve the situation. Regarding what I said on my previous feedback, I think I was half right to worry about a deus ex machina, cause that's indeed more or less the case (no real setup for such a payoff). But it seems to fit the settings so I won't be too much harsh about it :-þ I'd say, it does the job (even if it brings a lot of questions, such as, as it's now possible to take clothes from Eternum to the “real world”, would it work with Calypso or astral projections as well? But I guess we'll learn more in the next chapters, so, we'll see).
Not much to say about the ship travel and all, some points were fun (well done for the fake choices. Would have liked to keep Iago :-þ). I just wonder what would happen if Nova uses the tranquilizer dart pistol on somebody playing the conventional way, as IIRC there's an auto-logoff if you sleep too long in Eternum, and I think Orion slept way longer than that.
I guess the Office scene is a parody of The Stanley Parable? Didn't play it, thought, so I'm not sure. Anyway, not especially my kind of thing, but not displeasing either. Just rolled my eyes a bit about Orion saying "ultimate cuck move" about the desk picture, as the concept of “cuck” (and the use of it as a slur) doesn't fit a polyamourous setup like the one they're starting to create. But I guess he still have to learn! Also, back to the pirate server, I wasn't sure that the “mistress” thing really fit the scene and the girls' personality.
I as really hooked by the last talk with El Coyote. I was left a bit “meh” on the previous chapter, but now I would really like to see him again in the story and learn more about his motives and all. I'm not sure the story will go that way, thought, as it could have been the last time we heard about him, but if you're hesitating to bring him back or not, count my vote to yes! I'd say secondary characters like him having a real backstory, not related to the main one but interacting with it, it a really good point that makes Eternum even more interesting.
I was really happy to hear Oh What a Whirl (which I would call “Nova's theme” from now on) again when back at her home. And the same for “Dalia's theme” (I'd Rather Stay On Earth) later in the chapter too. It's really fun to have recurring musical themes like that, and adds a lot to the characters (I specifically asked for If I Had a Tail in my previous feedback, but I agree it wouldn't have matched Alex's scene in this chapter. Still asking to hear it again, thought! :-þ)
So, I guess I was right about Luna's vision. Would like to hear her telling more about it to Orion or one of the girls at some point, thought :-þ And Annie's reminder was really, really cute. I'm not sure about something there, thought, there's a possible inconsistency (or at least something that would need to be a bit more precisely explained):
– She first asks where the **fifth** Gem of Doom is found, and say it's on Ekabar (and especially not on The Red Herring),
– Then she explains how Thatanos find the first three of them, and say nothing changed between this point and the beginning of our story,
– Then the next Gem of Doom is the one find on Ekabar by Xet and Con, but that's logically the **fourth**,
– And then the one after is the one we found on The Red Herring, which is then logically the **fifth**, making her initial answer wrong,
– You then call the one from Garrington “the fourth one”, but it wasn't mentioned at all before, so the number feels wrong.
I'd say you should add a line while talking about how Thanatos get his three first, before talking about Xet and Con, to explicitly say that another Gem of Doom was found but that our favorite villain didn't find this one, that would work better.
(Also, about that, we didn't have a conclusion about Jasper Wagner's fate. They apparently know Thanatos followed them there, but there's not much said. And us autistic people have some difficulties with implicit things, so just a line or two about what happened there would be cool!)
And so, hm… OMG :-O <3<3<3
That spell. Annie being a total badass in front of the others. And even more, with a really cool “villain speech”, and just after having been so adorable. That's precisely what I was hoping for her, especially after her frustration from the previous chapters. Thanks a lot for that! :D
« Today… humankind will witness my true power. »
So, back to earth, both literally and metaphorically. Interesting scene on the restaurant. Didn't thought Noah and Raul where at such a position, it now feel a bit weird to have recruited them as henchmen for the heist. Mafia things is not for now what interests me the most in the story, but I wonder if what we saw there would be important later, or if it's “just” some world building.
So, some more cool things for Annie again, both with Eulalie and later with Orion, this one was really nice. Then, interesting scene with Alex. Am I wrong, or did Orion not notice that he travels between several Eternum severs without coming back to the “real world” between them this time? He just said he wasn't yet able to do that not long before. But I can understand that he had other things to focus on at this point.
And then back to Valley of the King <3 Well, that's in a part more arabian-like than egyptian-like this time, but it's still really cool. Once again, really cool choice of music, and really good background renders (took several new wallpapers from the oasis and the citadel). A bit sad to learn that Maat was looted even if we didn't do it, sounded unlikely as she was in a secluded place, but I know wonder if the mysterious thing she wants to do with the 80 eternals will be important later or not.
A bit surprising to see both Orion and Dalia needed the whole explanation to understand about how the Sultan managed to have such an high score, as it was something I thought about just by seeing he was a serious competitor, and I was absolutely certain about it just by reading him saying “incubator room”, but I guess Eternum takes place several years in the future, when people forgot how Xenomorphs reproduce :-þ
Also, a bit bothered by the fact we had, according to your walkthrough, to kill the doctor. I mean, we had to punch Axel both times to gain points with Annie and Alex, then we had to kill the cow-boy to gain points with Alex, and now this. It's a bit concerning that, each time we're given the choice, being violent is the right thing to do, don't you think? Especially in a setup like Eternum where I don't see how that would help (destroying her facility would certainly, but just killing her, she can probably go back just after the delay). Plus, her reaction to Orion showing mercy was interesting.
Also, rolled my eyes several times in the final scene with Dalia, there's some thing not really accurate there, but I guess people don't play such games to learn about how it really works :-þ
Also, once again, really pleased to see the situation change with Jerry. It was also something that I asked for in some previous feedbacks, isn't it? So thanks again for that! Can't wait to see how he's going on his new path.
And then, the new final. I was able to feel the attack coming by the time Orion entered the inn, so, to be honest, during this point, I was mainly thinking “no, he won't do that AGAIN?”
But you didn't! So thanks to have stopped just a bit later, with a good surprise. Now that's a good cliffhanger and I can't wait to learn more :D
(Now, thinking back about it, I probably should have see more of it coming by the time Orion thought about Hyril'ar in the inn, as you already did just the same trick with the Founder on the Rockfeller server, but I was too much focused about the possible bad news while playing.)
So, good work! Really enjoyed play the eighth chapter, and I'm way more looking for the ninth that I was for this one.
Now, if I can express some more wishes…
I'd say it would still be even better with a bit more diversity in background/neutral characters, could have been some black people in the Citadel, for instance.
I really would like to see Eva again, as I said earlier, I think she could be a perfect optional member of the team.
…and I think that's all story-wise, you already checked the main points of my wishlist! We'll see where everything is going, but for now, it's going just in the good directions.
Just two technical things, thought: I liked the interface from the previous chapter more than this one, but I think you'll change again later, so we'll see. But 9Gio starts to be reaaaaaally huge to download. Would it be possible to have just a diff, for people already having the previous version?