Thank you for sharing your insight about my game. I cannot agree more with what you said about a character's shames affecting one another.
(SPOILER ALERT FOR THOSE WHO DIDN'T PLAY THE GAME)
Love, Sam's narratives are driven by two diaries; one written by Sam in the past and one written by Kyle in the present within his subconscious. Both give very different perspectives on what happened in Rosen Peek to the players, therefore I carried the risk of the game's narratives being too confusing to deliver.
I had to be careful writing the two diaries so they don't drift too far apart from one another. Therefore, I set up a timeline of what happened in Rosen Peek (such as the date of Sam's arrival and the date of her meeting Brian for the first time). Next, I wrote Sam and Kyle's thoughts about those events in the form of diary entries and revealed each entries to the players in order (so if Kyle's diary is discussing incident A at one point, the players will be shown Sam's diary that talks about the same thing, but in her own way). That way, readers could effectively understand the story with broader perspective with minimum narrative confusion.
Next came endless proofreading. I checked for plot holes, missing/redundant details and how well the narratives can captivate the players until the very end of the game. I had some help from my friends because no matter how hard I tried to proofread with fresh perspective, it was just impossible. They were a huge help in not only finding bugs but improving the smoothness of storytelling. I guess the most important part of QA is ALWAYS GET HELP.
Your questions are very insightful. Are you majoring in or a professional in writing or game design? Thanks to you I'm having some time reevaluating my game. I hope my answers are helping you as much as they are helping me.