this is fantastic feedback, and it's something others have told me as well. dying is super punishing right now and it feels really bad. i have some ideas on how to improve this, but i'm not happy with any of them just yet 🙃
have you considered just making it so friends don't get reset at death? i know it sounds kind of sacrilegious to what a multiplier is supposed to be, but it would be the simplest fix and (imo) wouldn't ruin scoring, it would just make one death less of a disaster. would also have the added benefit of making it easier to tell when your next extra life is after dying.
that'll be my only suggestion because i know backseat game designing can be annoying. i just think this game rocks and could be a super fun and rewarding thing to put a lot of time into with a few minor tweaks. : )