Holy shit! I don't say this lightly you made a great game. I don't even mean the sex aspect I just mean in general. The story is phenomenal I say this as a writer. I do have notes a ton of them but only because you are damn close to making one of the best visual novels I have ever played which is a nigh impossible task usually for a non-japanese visual novel.
One of the only gripes I have I doubt will be an issue as you add more to the game. You end up having to "rest" quite often in between events.
In the warehouse when you have to sneak? I don't know if it was a bug or I just sucked at it but it seemed like the first guy turned around too quick (I know who it is I am just trying to give tips as vaguely as I possibly can as your story is just so damn good.
There are many instances in the game where the screen goes to black and a message pops up that says something like "not available in this update under development etc" This is a great indicator to let players know that though that is unavailable currently it is on the way. However there are plenty of instances where this is clearly the case and no indicator appears.
In a perfect world you wouldn't have to do anything to change it. However there are going to be players that think the game glitched or has some kind of bug. Most people will initially think there is an issue and then realize otherwise but there will be enough that you may be answering a lot of bug feedback that you don't need to. Or maybe it is to far in development to change it in which case ignore this minor gripe.
One example is after a certain woman says you can "stop by anytime" when you go there as indicated absolutely nothing happens. it is clear that this is the end of her content but no message pops up. Since there are instances in which you can "mouseover to highlight" something else in a scene I could see people thinking there is something they are supposed to "find" in said scene in order to interact further with her I too was thrown off for a few seconds looking for some kind of mouseover for speaking. Only for a few seconds I have alpha and beta tested plenty of games of all genres over the years but I then stayed in the room to see how "easy" it was for players to understand there was nothing further to do and it isn't straightforward enough.
This is handled better with an electronic salesman who outright tells you he is too busy to talk right now. This lets the player know no further action is available at this time BUT it doesn't OUTRIGHT tell the player it leaves them to wonder what is next. This is a better way to handle the barista and the woman at her house in question.
The fight minigame needs a little more polish. Most of your UI is pretty great the only exception I can find to this is your stats menu and the fight minigame. The quality is inconsistent with the rest of your interface Maps/Phone/Rooms/Investigation/Inventory etc are all great.
I am not sure how randomized your jan ken pon like system of fighting is. I feel like intelligence should affect it. This seems to be dialogue cut based for the most part but I don't mind it being randomish as long as it isn't 5 or 6 or 7 or 8 sequences in a row like that one encounter was. it is clear this is something you are already working on as in one much later encounter you and your enemy both have health bars. The one at your house though? (Which is done so well as is that one scene in the rain.
I love that you influenced by Illusion games (several scenes directly show this and I can tell it is going to be much much much more so as the game progresses) as well as Detective Conan! In the instance of the Illusion inspiration though there are two scenes in the game that are VERY severe as they absolutely should be as the fit the theme of this game but after they happen and after a dialogue comes up outright telling you in so many words their will be repercussions it is NEVER mentioned again. PRETTY DAMN important to the story but maybe this is just a plot thread you haven't full developed yet. Speaking of which I have some bad news that you may or may not have already been aware of.
I think your game is absolutely awesome so far I expected to get a few hours at the most out of this demo and I experienced well over 10 hours (maybe even more than that!! worth of content) To rip the bandaid off though.
There is no way in hell they are going to let you sell this on steam. You made a great game but it is far more twisted than what they allow in regards to certain scenes and I am not the type of guy to say "well all you have to do is edit this and you could release it" There are games on steam that were given the greenlight and have since been edited to stay there or were removed after testers PLAYED the game and found scene A or character B or Plot C that they felt took things way to far. Your game reminds me of a specific illusion game that was banned in the US and is why it was almost impossible to get an illusion game stateside. Your game has a MUCH better plot! You and I both know the game I am talking about but I won't mention it as your story is so damn good I really don't want to spoil even a modicum of information for players. so you have itch.io you have patreon and hopefully plenty of other sources as though Steam allows adult games now they keep waffling back in forth on WHAT they allow and they have outright stated they won't allow even the tamest of some things your game has so far that seem central to the entirety of your game.
I would love to continue to play your game as each update comes along but I don't think I will because I am paranoid that as you add more and more to the game there will come a point where my save will be incompatible. I love the game but it is over 10 hours so far. I can't imagine playing any game over and over and over again as it develops no matter how good it is. This is ok because it means you are taking the time to make something truly magnificent. its a damn shame there is the stigma of a non japanese visual novel not being "good enough" your plot is good enough that if it was a visual novel from Japan you would probably get a hentai adaptation explicit comics the whole nine yards. It makes me think you are some well known published author or screenwriter who is doing this as your true deep dark passion. It makes me think you are either from Europe or the US and desperately wanted to work on visual novels in Japan but do the their apprehension of foreigners infringing on their creative mediums it is almost impossible to get in there (have several friends who want to do the same are artists and can't even get their foot in the door. Japan has a lot of national pride especially in their entertainment medium. You can guest star but you can't BE a major player. So you branched out on your own and made a damn good game with your team. I see nothing but a bright future for you and am truly amazed by what you have accomplished here.
This also doesn't look like it is going to be finished anytime soon. I have never ever supported anyone on patreon and I have only contributed to a handful of kickstarters but I really believe in what you are creating here so I WILL contribute. Not yet I don't really have the funds right this moment but I am just blown away by the quality here so credit where credit is due. If I still reviewed games I would ask to interview you and put it as a damn featured article that is how good your game is. This isn't brownnosing I never give a compliment that isn't deserved. I thought I was going to play an hour long game with "bewbs" and that would be it. I spent every waking moment of the last two three days of freetime I had playing your game. Initially I was going to complain about no dialog for the female characters now I don't even care. You do need a hell of a lot more moaning sfx though. Those DO need to be everywhere in the game. So you do need VA for SFX and Foley for sexual sounds. You also need to proofread some of the dialogue I think I already read a book and halfs worth of dialogue so I wouldn't know where to begin with what or where but you have a great game here and you could make it a damn masterpiece with more polish which I know is something you plan on doing already with the amount of work you put in. I also saw something about this being version 0.43 and someone complaining i n the comments about how this was inaccurate as it can't possibly be half finished. I looked on your patreon page and found the game is 5% complete!!?!?!? How the hell are you doing this?
As great as the game is I can't play it over and over and over again. I genuinely think this is a project you are going to be working on for several years adding a chapter or two every few months and I can't wait to experience it I know alot of people get pissed off about games being anthologies but I think you could get away with it here. Especially if each game takes you three years to make. If you are really only 5% complete it looks like your game will rival the length of some of the longest most well known visual novels out there. You could very well set a precedent (along with Dr. Pinkcake who is also very good) That a visual novel doesn't have to come from Japan to be amazing. We already know that but the industry at large needs to know that for your credibility to truly skyrocket. As soon as I am able to I will start donating to your patreon (I am one of those assholes who paid nothing for the game but that is DEFINITELY not the case going forward) I probably will play your game only every 6 months or so unless there is some way to retain the save files. I feel very fortunate I was able to play as much as I could as quickly as I could I expect every 3 to 6 months you will add another hour or so worth of content and hope that OH!!!!
I KNOW HOW PEOPLE CAN KEEP THEIR SAVES I JUST REMEMBERED?!?!?! I have seen games do this before. Use a password system! kind of like what Mass Effect 2 and 3 did where they ask you questions of choices you made but your game has SOOOOOO many damn choices and options you would need probably about 30 different passwords for save states. Which trait a player started with, which sidequests were completed, current status of women, depravity or innocence level.
Seriously though I am sure it is on its way but there needs to be dialogue and interactions in reaction to those two scenes we both know I am talking about the people they happen to there is no way they wouldn't treat you differently. Positive or negative have to win their trust back. Be investigated yourself? Honestly I like your game enough that I wouldn't mind giving you some character development/dialog/plot info. Also something I have never offered to anyone. I am a wannabe writer who is unfortunately a professional procrastinator but if it is just a matter of something like phrasing a line more creatively that is written generic currently? or ideas of repercussions? I am your guy. Let me know.
Sincerely,
George E. Spears III