I can't write very well so take my critique with a grain of salt but I genuinely loved reading through your Twine game!
There were some grammatical errors and a bug or two (such as butler being stated at the end of the line again), and the image sizes sometimes caught me off guard (having them put to a standard height throughout the novel would be a nice bonus, but this is nothing that bothered me much at all).
This was before your update however so I will have to read through it once more and enjoy it all over again.
Overall the art choice was great, the story was fun to read through and the character background sheets were a pleasure to peer into on top of it all. It was an unexpected and nice final touch to your story.