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It would be great if you had a standalone version of this. Mostly so I could...actually play it.

My PC should be more than powerful enough to run this, but running it in-browser is absolutely frying  my CPU and I'm getting literally 2 frames per second, with inputs being practically useless. And since the game speed is apparently tied to the framerate....

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Did you try changing quality settings? It actually helps. Well... it should help in theory. In the end of the month I'm going to update the game, then I'll try to build for Windows. Don't know if it's going to work, sometimes Unity can produce bugs out of nowhere.