No offence taken, thank you a lot for this feedback. I'm really glad that it seems you understood exactly the story I wanted to convey.
It doesn't surprise me that some of it is a little overdone. A significant portion of it was done with only time for a first draft (and some with scarcely even time to proof-read) so it doesn't suprise me if some of it lacks nuance or refinement. I'm aware that it's very likely for me to construct a written sentence to make it as clear as possible (which takes away the spontaneous conversational feel sometimes). I say this not as an excuse, but an agreement that it could've been higher quality. And if I'd had more time, being able to make new drafts, and edits, to improve the reader's experience would've made me very happy.