The flickering red light and the choice of ambiant sounds are pretty good. It gives this story a very urban feel. There's a lot of details that provided the ambiance, the neon light, the greasy mirror, the descriptions of the body... And despite the abundance of details, there are so many ambiguities that makes the world feel more real and wide.
And then I notice that you made the gender of the other person switch between plays. I got masculine the first two runs and feminine on the third. I'm a big fan of texts that change between plays, I've used it myself in an older work too.
Overall, great work!