“it is the 1980s and you are dead.”
Thus begins NO BONES ABOUT IT, Richard Kelly’s ode to speed, skeletons and family. Make no mistake, this is no simple set of chase rules – it’s a standalone game! In videogame terms, a total conversion. NO BONES is the DotA to FIST’s Warcraft III. (Though there are rules for exporting NO BONES characters back into FIST.)
The new stats are FAST, ANGRY, DEATH and FAMILY. That last one was a surprise, until I realized, of course, the Fast and the Furious influence is evident. Having people you care about isn’t optional, it’s a part of the character building process. FAST handles racing, ANGRY throwing a punch, FAMILY protects those you care about, and DEATH works a bit like a saving throw and reveals supernatural insight. Vehicles have a symbiotic relationship with PCs, adding their stats and sharing damage. While driving, if you’d be reduced to 0 HP, you can bail and let your ride die in your place. There are new powers, my favorite being RATTLEBONES, MURDER of CROWS, and CALCIUM RESERVES.
The writing is confident and sharp. I particularly enjoyed the in-character introduction: “Alright, fresh kill. Here’s some things you need to know about yourself. You’re a REVENANT.” It’s hard to pull off, but when you manage (like Richard does), it’s like the old days of Shadowrun come rushing back, with all its bravado and weird slang. That opening monologue sets the mood, the tone, and most importantly, actually puts you in a skeleton’s shoes. “Sensations are blunted,” and even a blow to the shoulder is numb buzz. But adrenaline – you feel that plenty.
I firmly believe every game should ship with a scenario. “The Better Part Of Valor” is a perfect example of what a skeleton racing game should look like. It’s about a meet hosed by BLACKBIRD, who may or may not be a Revenant himself. It doesn’t go where you’d expect it to, and by the end, there’s a “Where to Go From Here” (always appreciated). If I had one request, it’d be for an example of play, illustrating how a standard car race might play out. The included scenario is great, but I want more!
The layout is clean, single column. Typography is mostly Space Mono, a typewriter style font. That and the two-tone black and white clip art really makes this feel more like a truly authentic zine than a PDF. It’s the sort of thing that could have been photocopied in the back of a copy shop and hand-stapled before being passed around friends after school. Authentic, but still highly readable onscreen. Some of the art looks pulled from a 30s horror comic, and I’m especially partial to page 23’s “Death careening toward the viewer” and page 5’s “Spooky Lady Drives a Wacky Racers Twisted Metal Mobile.”
NO BONES ABOUT IT seems like a lot of fun. It takes what could have been a one or two page add-on for FIST, and expands the concept into a full game, brimming with ideas. Despite being all bones, this project has a lot of heart. <3