Full and detailed review of the VN!
+ summary and analysis
SPOILERS BELOW THIS LINE
Disclaimer:
The information provided on this review is for general informational purposes only.
All information on the review is provided in good faith, however I make no representation
or warranty of any kind, express or implied, regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity,
reliability, availability or completeness of any information on the review.
Review
VN review and score (score affects the amount of stars you get in the rating).
purpose: provide constructive criticism to help the developer improve.
Score Chart =========== [150-125] : ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ [125-100] : ⭐⭐⭐⭐ [100-75] : ⭐⭐⭐ [75-50] : ⭐⭐ [50-0] : ⭐
VN Score: 137.5/150
Applies to version 1.0 [2023/07/29].
Score Breakdown:
-
『Visuals』 - 15/20
Images, videos, backgrounds, characters, drawings, animations, etc.
- Good:
- Clever usage of asset.
- Image complements the narrative.
- Use of animations and transitions through all the VN.
- Asset is credited.
- Neutral:
- One background.
- Background provided by third parties.
- Bad:
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- N/A
- Major (-5pts)
- No character sprites. (you were allowed to include at least one)
- Severe (-10pts)
- N/A
- N/A
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- Good:
-
『GUI』 - 17.5/20
Graphic user interface of the VN.
- Good:
- Original VN beginning.
- Dynamic NVL mode, rich text.
- Text is legible 100% of the time.
- Neutral:
- Renpy default skin with minor modifications.
- Bad:
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- Important screens removed, like Credits and About.
- Major (-5pts)
- N/A
- Severe (-10pts)
- N/A
- N/A
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- Good:
-
『Sound』 - 20/20
Music and sound effects; quality and sound design.
- Good:
- Clever usage of assets.
- HQ Sound.
- Sound communicates emotions and complements the narrative.
- Assets are credited.
- Neutral:
- Assets provided by third-parties.
- One sound effect.
- One song.
- Bad:
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- N/A
- Major (-5pts)
- N/A
- Severe (-10pts)
- N/A
- N/A
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- Good:
-
『Story』 - 20/20
Spelling, grammar and syntax’s correctness, also, narrative flow and consistency.
- Good:
- Clever and authentic narrative flow.
- Complex history in just 1000 words.
- Consistent story.
- Outstanding writing.
- Complex vocabulary.
- A meaning can be inferred, not just a sequence of events.
- The meaning is hidden in the small details.
- Neutral:
- N/A
- Bad:
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- N/A
- Major (-5pts)
- N/A
- Severe (-10pts)
- N/A
- N/A
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- Good:
-
『Setting』 - 20/20
Originality, ideas and worldbuilding in VN.
- Good:
- Reality combined with Fantasy.
- Historical Fiction.
- Neutral:
- XVI Century.
- Bad:
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- N/A.
- Major (-5pts)
- N/A
- Severe (-10pts)
- N/A
- N/A
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- Good:
-
『Gameplay』 - 20/20
About interactivity, e.g: kinetic, with choices, or higher.
- Good:
- Clever usage of NVL mode.
- Neutral:
- Kinetic Novel.
- NVL mode only.
- Bad:
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- N/A
- Major (-5pts)
- N/A
- Severe (-10pts)
- N/A
- N/A
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- Good:
-
『Programming』 - 15/20
Builds released, correct VN execution, bugs, crashes, etc.
- Good:
- No bugs.
- No crashes.
- Uploaded builds for most supported operative systems.
- Descriptive filenames.
- Neutral:
- Plain text scripts present on the game files
- Assets were not compressed in a RPA file.
- Bad:
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- N/A
- Major (-5pts)
- No android version.
- Severe (-10pts)
- N/A
- N/A
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- Good:
-
『Promotion』 - 20/20
About the thumbnail, title, game page, metadata, tags, description, screenshots, etc.
- Good:
- Title: Rare, but it’s a hint to understand the story.
- Description: Use of HTML. Informative and accurate.
- Thumbnail: Eye-catching image.
- Metadata: Filled all important info, updated.
- Tags: Multiple accurate tags, game is easy to find.
- Screenshots: Multiple game related images uploaded, people can judge before downloading.
- Neutral:
- Thumbnail: Can be animated.
- Tags: Would add “Renpy” and “vn”.
- Bad:
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- N/A
- Major (-5pts)
- N/A
- Severe (-10pts)
- N/A
- N/A
- Minor (-2.5pts)
- Good:
-
『Personal Opinion』 - 10/10
Is fun/cute/interesting/scary/etc? Did I like it? (subjective)
It was an interesting story.
I had fun deciphering this one.
Walkthrough / Summary
if kinetic: you get a summary.
purpose: provide insight about what people understood from the VN.
else: how to get all the endings, along with a brief text about how I played the VN.
purpose: provide insight about how people play the VN.
An airborne ship reaches a mountain.
Two girls get off, a captain and a bride, and begin the ascent to the ancient temple in the mountain.
They will pray for good fortune, but the Captain is greedy and feels nothing else.
That’s why the prayer didn’t work, something went wrong.
The Captain doesn’t know what happened, but for the bride everything was clear.
The dark god did not listen, and he has spoken. Revenge is what the two of them seek.
Will the priestess respond to his call? Or will she live with the remorse of having betrayed all his beliefs, his people, and his land?
This is a VN where the big story is hidden in the small details.
Analysis
on what I interpreted, learnt, and thought after playing this VN. (highly subjective)
purpose: improve story clarity and reduce risk of misinterpretation.
A story so short and so deep that most of its meaning is behind obscure symbols and words.
I had to try harder to understand this one, here’s my attempt:
- About Ségou
Apparently, this is a French word for some African tribe.
That a dangerous mountain has to be climbed to pray to a dark god, reminds me of the rituals and human sacrifices of the ancient religions of the native peoples.
From here, I understood what all of this was about: the Era of the French Colonial Empire.
- About Mogho Nabaa
Another word related to an African tribe colonized by the French.
This means the ruler of everything, the king of the empire.
- About Mossi
Yet another African word that means “Agricultural People of Africa”, this is the way to reveal Ellie’s past: just an innocent citizen.
- About The Nameless One
Ruler of Life, and later Ruler of Death…
It’s a fancy way of saying that all the people and land that worshiped him is now destroyed, by none other than the people in the air fleet.
Both he and Ellie seek revenge, because Ellie had faith in him, she was the priestess of this god’s temple.
- About the Wind
It’s curious that The Nameless One talks to Ellie before she even enters the temple.
He talked to her while she was having a hard time climbing the mountain.
That makes me think… Is this the way to say that he already know her?.
Or maybe… there is no god? it was just Ellie all along?
“But what she heard, she already knew”
It doesn’t matter, it’s clear that Ellie’s wishes and the dark god’s wishes are the same.
- About Syna
The captain of the ship, the butcher captain.
Is told that Ellie “was extracted from nothingness” and was protected by Syna.
The reader must ask: why?
There is a strong possibility that Syna is responsible for that “nothingness”.
It is evident that her air fleet is connected to the war, and Ellie is nothing more than a war prisoner, an slave.
“Followed Syna through a thousand battles”
“You know exactly WHO and WHAT is grinded into dust”
“if it weren’t for your sewing skills”
Is clear that “butcher” means MURDERER.
- About Ellie
The story constantly suggests that the relationship between Syna and Ellie is not consensual.
Ellie is scared, she doesn’t want to climb the mountain, she doesn’t love Syna enough to do it.
She really forced herself to “do her part”, but she couldn’t do it, she couldn’t forgive.
What Ellie really wants is revenge for what Syna did to her home and family.
That’s why the bride becomes the priestess of death, I think Syna is her only target.
“Strike to the Hearth”
- About the Azurium
Azurium is a word derived from Azurite, a blue rare-earth that is primarily used for pigments.
Did you choose this color because it was the color that the french army used in the colonial era?
In this VN the Azurium is an important and expensive rare “substance” for the sails and clothing of the army.
Again, it is well known that Europe is scarce in materials, and gets most of it from foreign countries. Nambia (an African country) apparently has loots of Azurite.
This was one of the main reasons (perhaps the only one) that caused the European Colonial Era, a time deeply plagued by wars.
Why would Ellie eat the Azurium?:
I don’t know, but it worked, it forced the captain to take her prisoner. Now she’s near the source of all her misery and soon will avenge all that has been lost.
- About the Air Fleet
Airborne ships is just a way to blur the true nature of this story, we need to pay attention.
“Corvett”: I interpret it to be an old French word that is no longer used and means “warship”.
“Sail”: I interpret a boat propelled by the wind.
“His Grace”: I interpret it to be of European origin and was commonly used to refer to a Queen or King, here the era of the monarch is established.
“Sextants”: I interpret it to be a really old artifact from ancient centuries.
An old warship propelled by sails with a tribute to the monarchy, reminds me once again, of the European colonial era.
Comments
Anything goes.
Thanks for sharing this under a libre license!
Obviusly this VN is between the limitations of a game jam, and you did very well on that regard.
I hope my review reflects this limitations, I tried not to be too strict this time.
Overall, Sylvan Disappearance keeps being your best work.
Looking forward for more VNs, you’re very good!
Hope this helps! ❤️