Let me start by telling you I'm really grateful for the time you took to try to help better my game. I want to make sure you know I'm not upset about your comment at all, and I read all of it carefully while I thought in my mind about the full story I have in mind for it.
That being said, reading through your list of predictions about the story has really told me I am on the right track, as there is just one of them that is true and it's already clearly stated and confirmed at the end of the demo I published, so it isn't a prediction but something you know from simply playing the game. Every other statement was false, so my story isn't really as predictable as you might think. I especially feel the need to clarify something: all the characters in this story that are gay or bi aren't that way because of abuse, but simply because they have always liked men. Lysander was always gay, even in his past, even when he was still a good person and long before he ever met Syryus. The same goes for Syryus himself. They were born that way.
I have to say I'm a little confused by the orc example. I really don't see anything wrong with adding details to characters' personalities. If the orcs are so brutal they rape people, that's just something that tells me, as a reader/player/whatever medium is used to convey the story, just how nasty and bad these orcs are. I want to hear it. It gives me important hints about the characters and makes the story feel more real. If we started thinking that way about every detail, behavior, quirk of any character that doesn't add anything in particular to the main story, all the characters of all the stories in the world would just behave all the same way, bland and plain, with nothing setting them apart.
Even though, as I said, I'm really grateful for your time and for all the feedback you're providing, I think your list of theories confirmed that it's a little too early to have an opinion about what happens in the game and you're rushing to judge something that doesn't even exist yet. There is so much of the backstory of the characters that you don't know, that no one but me and my closest friends know, that I'm wondering how you're judging the events of the game as useless without being sure if they will have an explanation in the future or not. If I can give you a piece of advice, I think when you play a demo and you want to be helpful to the developer, you should keep in mind you're only seeing a small part of the experience. You should remember that before rushing to think, "Oh, this thing that happened here is useless to the plot," because you don't know much about the plot until you've played the full version. Maybe something you thought didn't add anything to the story is actually a crucial event that has a lot of meaning, and you just don't know yet.
Unfortunately, there's a specific reason why Mallory has to die right at that moment, so early in the game. It has to do with Lysander's habits, and it will be explained later on. There is no way for me to postpone her death without completely altering Lysander's character, and I don't really see a reason to do that. Her death wasn't just an excuse for Syryus to be able to tell the player Lysander used to be good. If I'm being honest with you, the whole monologue at the end was completely unplanned, I just added it at the end because it felt right, and Mallory's death had already been decided long before. There's a reason why I created her, if her death so early on wasn't justified I simply wouldn't have made her and Lyam would have been the only one venturing into the forest and needing shelter.
About Lyam's naive behavior, I just thought of an easy fix that would make him falling asleep more believable. I'll implement it in the next version of the game. As for him not confronting Lysander about the names, I already explained myself. Lyam is meant to be shy and weak at the beginning of the game, not able to stand up for himself. You did, however, make me realize that maybe him peacefully going to sleep after feeling something was off is a bit of a stretch. That will be fixed. Thank you.
About Mallory calling Lyam "big brother" instead of "Lyam," I'm not a native speaker, so it didn't sound weird to me, but thank you for the tip. I'll make sure to discuss it with my husband, the proofreader of the game. He's from the United States, and he already went through all the text boxes and fixed anything he found that didn't sound good to him. Maybe he just didn't pay much attention to it, but I'll ask him if he thinks I should change it.
One last thing: Syryus asked Lyam for forgiveness when he was asleep. He wouldn't dare say something like that to his face, not when he just lost his sister. He was mostly talking to himself, trying to process the pain he went through. If you think the next morning Lyam will wake up, find the will in his heart to forgive his sister's murderer, and peacefully step out of his room to go grab breakfast, that's not how things will go. You said Lyam will need to have a strong reason to ever forgive Lysander. While Mallory being revived is not an option, that doesn't mean he'll just forgive him for no reason, forgive him fully, or forgive him at all. It will be actually up to the player to decide, and it will have its consequences on the ending.
Whether you feel like giving this game another chance in the future or not, it is completely up to you. If you decide you're not interested and it's not for you, nothing's wrong with that! Everyone has their own tastes. If you think you'd like it, you're welcome to play the full version when it comes out.
Thank you again for everything!