Hey, just downloaded the game and got a few steps in. Some constructive criticism, please use contractions in dialogue. I am - I'm, can not - can't, you are - you're, how is - how's etc. Spoken English sounds robotic and stilted without them, and I have seen more than a few times they could have been utilised.
For the "Narrator", please, don't. Unless you intend to characterise the narrator, use inner monologue and in story beats to do exposition. Narration in a written medium is entirely useless (again, unless the narrator is a character themselves.)
A hint for Renpy in particular, please use different colours for the names of different characters, it makes distinguishing who is talking at a glance much easier, especially when the framing isn't obvious.