Thanks!
Swabbof
Recent community posts
I like what's here, but (spoilers) at points it feels like a wikipedia article or information piece on the various fields you researched to make this game. It's a little dull to read about "Deaf culture" and the subtleties of AA the way you're wording it. I care more about the characters than getting exposition about their back story. I'd trim it down a bit, just a suggestion. Show, don't tell.
Also, the tiger being deaf, why is that so emphasized? I legit laughed when the second conversation also started about him being deaf. Don't deaf people want to be treated like regular people, too? Don't gay people want to be treated like regular people?
Colby seems normal enough, he gets around and is even a porn star, but he doesn't march down the street in a rainbow jockstrap because gay isn't his only personality trait.
Sorry if this is a bit abrasive! You're a good writer, besides. I'm enjoying it, and the text message mechanic is especially cute. Just wanted to give some constructive feedback.
Just finished the prologue. I have to say dude, you've got something good here. You blew my expectations out of the water. Great pacing, great mix of comedy, great soundtrack, seriously fantastic work here. Usually references are cringey and awkward, but they fit here for whatever reason, I kekked more than once. Great job!