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Worldbuilding

A topic by Greysmile created Oct 05, 2021 Views: 361
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Hey! I just played your demo and I noticed some issues with the worldbuilding in your story. At first, I want to say that I really like the type of world you've created, this kind of medieval Europe at the beginning of the industrial revolution is common, but I like the way you've expressed it and included other species. In fact, I'm a huge fan of this animal-like creatures, this wolf in the tavern for example looks really interesting (and cute). :3 So please don't take my critic too seriously, I can be a bit nitpicky sometimes...

Nevertheless, I have some issues with Armin and Ohrenstead. At first, I think it is really unlikely for him to become a smith in, like, one day. Becoming a smith takes years of practise, and it's not possible to become one by only reading a journal. For example, things like temperature are difficult to write down if you don't have a thermometer in your forge (which I assume he doesn't have). Or how the iron must look like when you can form it easily without breaking. Well, I understand that this isn't a game about Armin becoming a blacksmith, but it kind of bothered me a little bit. In medieval towns, he wouldn't been even allowed to sell his ware if he hadn't have some kind of education since the guilds controlled every craftsman's work. This could explain his strength and talent in fighing, too. By the way, why doesn't he go to some kind of teacher? This would be far more educational than reading a journal without pictures - or maybe he could have been educated by his father before he got missed, and trained himself afterwards, so that he is used to smith housewares when the story begins? In this case, you could maintain the mechanic of finding different crafting recipes, but it would be explained why Armin is able to craft them perfectly at the first try.

To keep to the point, I think it is very impractical for the soldier to just order some random kind of iron sword, since nearly every sword is made of iron and there are much more important properties for a sword. Weigth, for example, of length, sharpness, hardness, the grip (both the one parallel to the blade and the vertical one for blocking attacks), the form of the blade or its balance. There are a thousand different types of iron swords and each one requires a hole different education: For example, there are swords that need to be led with two hands, some are too malleable to hit your opponent's sword directly, there are swords so long that the fighter has to bend down and try to impale his enemy (which looks really funny, by the way), and there are swords so short that it is common to grap your enemy's grip and try to cut him with his own blade (I don't know the translation for this, but in German it is called something like "sword wrestling"). "Iron sword" sounds like an odd name, too standard and a bit naive (which fits Armin's low knowledge, but I doubt that he didn't learn anything from his father).

Er ... I actually don't want to be so nitpicky, but I've got a problem with Armin's family too. By looking at his furniture and contrabass and the wallpaper in his room (and even the fact that he has his own room), it seems to be that they're really wealthy - but why? Neither Rose nor Armin appear as workers, so do they live of cost of their savings? There are no animals or gardens too, so do they pay for all of their food and clothes and furniture? This would be a really expensive lifestyle, and his father seems to be missing for years now. He might have been a really good sword smith with a big income and low expenses (well, he must have been really stingy at least). But how did he work? Usually, being a smith is a really hard job so I don't think he was able to do all this alone, so why aren't there any trainees or helpers? And by the way, why don't they live in the same house where the forge is? It wasn't common to seperate your workspace and living rooms until the industrial revolution happend. I get it that your world is just different to ours, but it would be more practical to join both buildings, to save both costs and time. And why does Ohrenstead need a sword smith in the first place? It is unlikely for him not to live in a bigger town near to the military's garnisions, and if there are any garnisions nearby, there would be more than one sword smith for them all. Maybe it would be more realistic if Armin's family once lived in a bigger town, but then moved into a small cottage outside of Ohrenstead because of their financial problems after his father disappeared. This could explain why they're seperated from all of the other villagers - and it could show how they try to get around. (... er, I don't want to correct your story, it just came to my head.) Anyways, although I like the contrabass, I think it is odd for Armin to play an instrument. He'd need some kind of teacher, and I doubt that there are any sedentary musicians in Ohrenstead, and some kind of luthier too. But ... actually, I really like this facette of Armin, it makes him much more sympathic and gives him a unique trait I didn't expected.

And at least I've got a question: Is it a coincidence that all of the villager's names (except Armin's and Rose's) are old German names - and "Ohrenstead" sounds like "Ohrenstedt", which means "ear town" in Old German? It's a bit droll name, but well, town names are known to be droll sometimes - in fact, I really like it. :D

(Oh, and there was a abandoned (?) storyline I was really interested in: Where did the dog go who illigally entered the tavern? Does he return at some point of the story line? I tried to follow him, but he just disappeared...)

I hope I wasn't too mean or pedantic something, these are just some things that came to my mind while playing this nice, wonderful animated game. Thank you for releasing this demo, I truly enjoyed playing! :)

Have a nice day!~