Hey there! Thank you for your submission. As a fellow VN dev, I feel a personal attachment to this one!
With positives, I think you did a good job with using basic Ren'Py code to create a cohesive, living environment with characters changing expressions, bouncing, and reacting. A little goes a long way in this sense, and it felt like BA!
The plot was also pretty fun to follow! Low stakes though it may be, for something like a GDD game being played in real time, it works well. The character interactions are also pretty fun and generally accurate to how they canonically are.
As for my criticisms, I will say that you could have cut out some unnecessary dialogue that pads the script out, especially with scenes like Yuuka talking to herself about her affections for Sensei, a lot of Midori and Momoi's arguments, and even some of Yuzu's fears about the twins being dead. It gets a little repetitive after a while if you're just repeating the same idea - i.e. "I love Sensei."
Aesthetics-wise, I would have lowered the characters down a little more to mimic the BA style, putting each sprite's default position at about thigh-level. It might just be what I'm used to in VNs though.
Great work in total! I can't wait to see more of your projects in the future!
Thank you for the feedback! It was fun for me too since this was the first time I played around with sprite animations besides fade and dissolve.
And yes, now that you mentioned it, I feel the same way about the twins' argument and Yuuka's monologue. But I didn't even notice Yuzu's script being a problem, So thank you for bringing that up to my attention, I will keep all of this in mind if I update the game later.
Actually, I just made a remake of this game with replaced visuals and audio assets. Too bad I didn't read your feedback before finishing it. If I did, then I could have prevented the mistake about the story and the sprite's default position.
And yes, if you or other players are more familiar with certain aesthetics in VN, then I think it would be a good idea for me to mimic that. So thank you for telling me about that too. It's something I would likely miss for a while if not for you.
Thank you! I'm also looking forward to talking with you again in the future. It's nice to see a fellow VN dev succeeding and growing. So I wish you well and success in your endeavor. Cheers!
I'm open to positive and negative feedback, so feel free to leave a comment below. Your feedback will help me to create better games for you in the future. Thank you~
Comments
Hey there! Thank you for your submission. As a fellow VN dev, I feel a personal attachment to this one!
With positives, I think you did a good job with using basic Ren'Py code to create a cohesive, living environment with characters changing expressions, bouncing, and reacting. A little goes a long way in this sense, and it felt like BA!
The plot was also pretty fun to follow! Low stakes though it may be, for something like a GDD game being played in real time, it works well. The character interactions are also pretty fun and generally accurate to how they canonically are.
As for my criticisms, I will say that you could have cut out some unnecessary dialogue that pads the script out, especially with scenes like Yuuka talking to herself about her affections for Sensei, a lot of Midori and Momoi's arguments, and even some of Yuzu's fears about the twins being dead. It gets a little repetitive after a while if you're just repeating the same idea - i.e. "I love Sensei."
Aesthetics-wise, I would have lowered the characters down a little more to mimic the BA style, putting each sprite's default position at about thigh-level. It might just be what I'm used to in VNs though.
Great work in total! I can't wait to see more of your projects in the future!
Hi there!
Thank you for the feedback! It was fun for me too since this was the first time I played around with sprite animations besides fade and dissolve.
And yes, now that you mentioned it, I feel the same way about the twins' argument and Yuuka's monologue. But I didn't even notice Yuzu's script being a problem, So thank you for bringing that up to my attention, I will keep all of this in mind if I update the game later.
Actually, I just made a remake of this game with replaced visuals and audio assets. Too bad I didn't read your feedback before finishing it. If I did, then I could have prevented the mistake about the story and the sprite's default position.
And yes, if you or other players are more familiar with certain aesthetics in VN, then I think it would be a good idea for me to mimic that. So thank you for telling me about that too. It's something I would likely miss for a while if not for you.
Thank you! I'm also looking forward to talking with you again in the future. It's nice to see a fellow VN dev succeeding and growing. So I wish you well and success in your endeavor. Cheers!
I'm open to positive and negative feedback, so feel free to leave a comment below.
Your feedback will help me to create better games for you in the future.
Thank you~