You seem to have physics calculations on Update() which is framerate dependent (not good), use FixedUpdate() instead. My virtualized i3-4170 couldn't keep up (30-40FPS) resulting on various bugs and glitches. The camera is also a bit wanky, try making it a child of the Player or you can use Vector3.SmoothDamp inside Update() https://docs.unity3d.com/ScriptReference/Vector3.SmoothDamp.html to make it nice and smooth.

The humor and WTF factor was high, I'm glad you submitted it!

It also puts me in the mind of "Stanley Parables" game, where Stanley has all these weird, unfinished games, by themselves they don't have as much power, but when linked together with a narrator and a really weird plot, it takes on a whole new meaning.   

I laughed when I died and got pulled all over the place, but other than that, the game feels kind of incomplete. It didn't even let me restart the level after I died. I would recommend taking it as a learning experience and moving on to a new project, because unfortunately, this one doesn't have an identity of its own. It's just a basic platformer with pictures of NDT in the background. I'm guessing there are components that you can take away and incorporate into a more unique game.