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"if you love me let her go"

A topic by Pseudonymous Gamer created Jul 11, 2020 Views: 316 Replies: 7
Viewing posts 1 to 8
(+6)

Howdy y'all. I'm making a Visual Novel in Ren'Py.

The inspiration of this game is a conversation with my grandmother. I am a trans man, and I was increasingly frustrated at trying to explain how transphobia impacts literally every aspect of my life. My grandmother simply didn't understand, and I was in the moment at a loss for how to communicate effectively. Later I came up with an explanation that I wanted to turn into a zine, but the idea got too big to squash into a zine. So here I am, making it a VN instead. Somewhere along the way this became less about telling my grandmother, specifically, and more about telling a story that I need to tell for myself no matter who else listens. 

This game is going to have heavy topics at times, warnings include but are not limited to transphobia (obviously), self harm, and suicidal ideation. If this isn't your cup of tea, I totally understand. I'll keep the discussion of such at a minimum here, and be as non-descriptive as I can.

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July 11th, 2020. Dawn of the first day. 14 days remain.

My idea for the frame of this game is that the Player is directly interacting with the main character as the kid grows up. The Player is prompted to name the kid so that the Player has some emotional investment in the kid's life. The kid is a trans boy, but since he's based on my own personal experiences, he won't realize it until he's in college. So the Player might not realize it either because the game doesn't make it specifically clear until the end. There will be several chapters, each one representing a chunk of the kid's childhood. Toddler, kindergarten, middle school, high school. Each chapter has one significant event in it. Each event is a point at which the kid is exploring his gender identity/expression, and the Player can be supportive or not. Each unsupportive answer is a point that will count toward the "bad" ending. Each supportive answer is a point towards the "good" ending. Tallying these points is a surprise tool that will help us later.

The art style is going to be fairly simplified, both to save time on making assets, and because I think it looks nifty. Every background and sprite will be done on black with sketchy white lines. The opposite from a typical scribbled drawing (black lines on white) should help the game feel somewhat unsettled and unfamiliar. It will also help any additional colors pop even more, since they'll be vibrant in an otherwise dark picture.

I've not thought about music yet. Although I have snagged a nifty knife slash SFX (from Freesound) that I should get some mileage out of.  It's a surprise tool that will help us later. Related to a metaphor in the story, not self harm, if you were wondering.

I've tinkered with Ren'Py before and yet, I'm having to learn a few things that I want to do for the sake of this game. I'm currently stuck on making the "player inputs a name for the kid" bit of code, but I'll get it eventually. (Indentation is going to give me gray hair, I'm sure.) I'm probably going to stick a pin in that and get into the main script, since writing dialogue and making menus/choices to jump between scenes is something I can already do, and the player-given name is a flourish I can add later. I want to replace the graphics for the various menus, dialog boxes, and buttons, and I've never done that before. Can't be too hard, right? I'd like to try having a name be randomly generated from a list, if I have the time to experiment with that. 

(+1)

Sounds like a cool idea! I'll be following along for sure, looking forward to seeing your progress!

(Your grandmother definitely sounds like my grandparents trying to understand my sexuality ^_^")

(+1)

Definitely interested in seeing what you make. Indentation definitely takes a while to get used to, that and colons, haha. There's a lot of tutorials you can find about specific stuff you want to do, and stuff in the documentation as well. If you haven't seen these yet, here's a couple of links to get you started:

GUI https://www.renpy.org/doc/html/gui.html 

using random integers https://www.renpy.org/doc/html/other.html?highlight=random#renpy-random

Submitted(+1)

Im excited to play this game when it's finished!

Host(+1)

ahhh i love this so much! i love seeing personal + heavy emotional topics tackled in games/narratives, esp if they have significance to the devs. i'm curious who the "player" would be--is this player sort of the protag talking to himself? or might it possibly be family or friend as the game goes on? either way this sounds so lovely and i'm looking forward to seeing more. best of luck this jam!

(+1)

Ohhh, I can't wait to see how this turns out! Wishing you the best in development, and the best in life as a fellow trans man. I'm sure you'll do great!

(+1)

July 19th.  Six days remain.

I have severely underestimated how difficult it is to work on my laptop when I'm very nearsighted and don't have a functional pair of glasses.  After leaning forward and squinting for several days, I ended up with a migraine and backache. Don't be like me.

On the plus side, as I was forced to take a break, I decided that the story has two arcs - the player plays as first the mother and then the kid. Basically going through the same events twice, with two different perspectives.

I 'm scrambling to get new glasses, and might just get them in time to put a rush job on finishing this up in time to submit. I'll likely sacrifice fancy flourishes, like custom GUI and animations, just to get it done.

(I can always make a more polished version later, yeah? Yeah. That's what definitive editions are for.)

Host(+1)

aww i'm so sorry to hear that! i'm glad you were able to take a break. dev can be strenuous esp because we might not even realize it at first so it's important to take rest seriously. i hope you feel better soon--and don't worry too much if you only submit a demo or unfinished game. putting yourself first is more important! (and honestly, it will help you be able to work on games for longer as well) wishing you luck!