Thanks for the incredibly detailed feedback! I really appreciate the time to write things down! For the narration, luckily I'm taking from an actual poem, and so there's recordings of people reading it online that are copyright free (check out LibreVox!) and so I simply edited this rather than trying to get my own recording. Though I think if I were to improve on the game, I'd want to record my own narration somehow.
As for the intro, I did actually think about this! Before the scene is shown, there's the title card, and then just the word "FLEE" on screen before the gameplay and main narration start. This was meant to be an indication of what to, with the implication that it could start right away. Obviously difficult to tell if this is something that is a recurring problem since there's not that many people playing and leaving feedback. But I agree that it's tricky to find a balance in keeping things abstract vs communicating what's happening to the player. I think the smallest change I could make that would maybe help is changing that text to "FLEE NOW" to indicate an urgency and the fact that they can actually move right away.
Anyways, I'm so glad you enjoyed it and that you found it thought provoking! It's always super satisfying to hear that my work has somehow affected someone, so I appreciate it.