Avoiding typos and correct punctuation are important. Especially when a game is majorly made out of text, without too much art or gameplay to back the story up.
I don't mind if the story takes time to build up, but it has to be correct at least. There are a few places where I think the writer means something else (ex: visible > one cannot see things), and the text does not make perfect sense in English. The "guessing" part is extremely difficult due to losing context in translation.
Lastly, trying to please people with explicit content in a game is very tricky. Dedicated explicit game enjoyers have high standards for them, even surpassing SFW video games. So be very, very careful when you play this card.