Hello! Thanks a lot for your feedback. It's true that it's still a demo with quite a few bugs and typos, which is why I invite you to join the server and let me know if you find any. And yes, this is my first visual novel, and I did everything on my own (except for the music and sprites; the music comes from free-to-use sources on YouTube, and I'll make them available if people want to find them).
By the way, thanks for your detailed critique; it really helps me see which direction I should refocus on to improve my game.