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We got to the bottom of this I believe. It looks like the Satellite UI which controls mission selection after the Octopus Intro just doesn't show up if you're not playing in full screen! Hopefully you're able to play now, the battles are certainly more entertaining than speaking to the Octopus indefnitely!

Still no luck! After the game started, I just clicked on the octopus. Then the octopus wonders why is there an otter underwater. Then after clicking once more on the octopus, it asks what can it do for me. And that's it.. After clicking again a few times on the octopus, I think the same dialogue "What can I do for you?" Still appears, but the letters are exchanged in order, but I don't know if that is intentional. The menu for the satellite opens, but no missions inside.. I am sorry if I am missing something obvious! Would be happy to try again later as well

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in full screen? i hope thats the fix! Also try scrolling that scroll view of the satellite UI a bit to see if you can find the mission

It is in fullscreen! I get stuck just here (the very start of the game). 

As I said, if I click over and over on the octopus, sometimes it will ask me the same question, but with weird wording, like:

"O C|T ODPOU SF: O RW HYAOTU ? CAN I DO FOR YOU?"

I can upload an screenshot for you to see, I didn't upload another one right now  just to avoid spam screenshots here..

would you mind hopping in a discord call for a minute really quick? it would be super helpful for us since we cant get this to happen to us. My discord is Mr. Clocks in the brackeys server (mr.clocks is the discord account name)

Of course, I am at streaming_1 voice call in Brackeys discord server