I loved the stark choice of colors! The backgrounds worked too.
A time-loop is intimidating to keep track of, but you did a good job with the "Runs" mechanic of trying to simplify that. Although, I do like the idea of players learning from their mistakes, I think I would probably run this divorced of the time-loop, as it's still a very usable, short and sweet dungeon with just a few tweaks.
I liked that the descriptions were straight to the point and Cudgel, with crystals growing from his eyes, was a definite highlight. I also liked how you dealt with Death and Dying, Ending the Adventure, and Loose Ends right up front.
I think the characters on page 6 are so well developed that its a shame they're meant to be for the PCs - they'd make great NPCs for a party to encounter and they are fabulously illustrated.
Viewing post in Guards...Guards? jam comments
Haha, it's amazing to hear how many people are really resonating with the guards.
I could absolutely see a version of this adventure though with the guards running rampant throughout the manor, only to solve...very few problems.
I knew that one of the biggest challenges I'd have with an adventure would be getting players and referees interested in running pre-gens instead of their own characters, so I really agonized over each of the guards' personalities, looks, and habits. Anecdotally, I play tested this adventure with a DnD/Pathfinder group that doesn't usually get super into roleplay. It took them less than 20 seconds to turn completely belligerent after reading their characters.