Is there nobody you can bounce these conversations of to get some feedback? A female/male perspective could perhaps help as well (if you can find someone IRL that you can have those conversations with).
I was more thinking about when you're still deciding things, like an author friend of mine used to ask me things because she wanted a male perspective. She was heavily surprised by some of my answers, but it did help her to think in the right direction and decide what she wanted to do and how it would be perceived. No worries if that is not your way of working.