Spoiler-filled comment
I was intrigued by the things that happened on the television that set up the main conflict. “The public grows anxious of rising hospitalization rates. Spin City continues to be one of the remaining bastions of safety as conditions worsen worldwide. The search for a cure prevails.”It got me wondering what they were being hospitalised by and what the worsening conditions were. Things seem to be pretty swell in Spin City, besides the shady stall and the corrupt mayor. It’s a sanctuary, but it took me a while (and some rereading) to understand that the place is a sanctuary from what I assume is a horde of feral half-changed? I had thought on first read that “The Half-Changed. They are prone to all baser instincts, feverishly attacking others. In response, dozens of sanctuaries like Spin City were built…” meant that the sanctuary was to protect the Half-Changed, then wondered why none had been shown in the city. It doesn’t feel like a place that’s being constantly assaulted by zombies. Jess mentions having never seen a change in person, but we don’t get much indication of how the characters think of the Half-Changed or how the city is a sanctuary from grim conditions elsewhere. Are all of the characters from here? Did they come from somewhere else where things are worse?
Maybe it’s a slow burn, but it feels off to me that we’re getting so much progress on the evil mayor plot before Jess and co. have very much reason to be personally involved. If it was one of their friends who had half-changed and then been imprisoned, it would be a clear connection between the plots. With the mayor’s speech at the end, we know they want to cure the Half-Changed and are somewhat successful through cruel, secret experiments. But Jess’s involvement with that doesn’t extend past witnessing the stranger transforming and getting carted away.
From the mayor’s imprisonment of the half-changed person, I get that they’re obviously the villain, but it feels weird because they’re also basically curing the zombie outbreak at the same time? You can have a complex character who does things that seem both evil and virtuous at the same time, but there’s way more moustache-twirling villainy than good in the way the character is portrayed as opposed to the text acknowledging that they have good end goals. I have to sit and think for a bit about the zombie outbreak plot to realise that the cure is actually a pretty great thing for the society to have. I figure that the zombie outbreak was caused by the hubris of scientists seeking immortality, but it’s better that they fix it than not.
I’m not sold on Jaxo becoming Jess’s and Griswald’s friend so quickly. The introduction scene isn’t particularly compelling as it relates to her or her relationships with other characters since the focus is more on the shady stall. Then it feels like only days later they all act as if they had known her for much longer.
Another question I have about the characters: what is Jess’s occupation, exactly? There aren’t that many days in the game, and it could be that it’s all long weekend or something, but don’t they have a job or school or something that they would mention?
The graphics are cute, Jess in particular. Their face is very expressive, as well as the wing movement changing with expressions. The magnifying glass as a frame for their portrait is a nice touch, and that you see the portrait change when they get up and put on a shirt. I like the idea that one of the characters is actually just super tiny, and that the story acknowledges it regularly, like with Griswald giving them a tiny fish and Jess having a guest room for non-bees. Though there is one line about both Jaxo and Jess making splashes in the pool on entry from the water slide, and I don’t think Jess could make a “noteworthy splash”.