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you might want to look up the https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uncanny_valley it is a good explanation for many things you will see happening in this topic.

you used the term cognitive dissonance and that is what is happening in the valley of the graph and why it is uncanny. mixed signals. it makes people uneasy. the graph in the explanation is between living people and unliving puppets. but you can draw similar graphs for gender and anything else that can give mixed signals.

so i would see the desire to upgrade "the mask" by using and presenting girly things as trying to overcome the valley of mixed signals and be on the other side. we are not puppets after all and realize that we give off signals.

Oh wow, I learned about the uncanny valley way before cognitive dissonance (I used to be super into making video games so I learned about it with 3d art, not that I ever made anything 3d anyway), but I never considered that they're one in the same. 

I love that so much too, about seeing typical-gendered stuff as another form of uncanny valley, and thereby being able to power through it. I 100% agree btw that realizing the signals are happening and that it's in our power for how we want to receive those signals is hugely important and necessary for growth... in all kinds of stuff, not just the weird things society teaches us.

- ✨Beth