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(3 edits)

From what I have played  (which is, admittedly, probably too much), nobody sells ropes or cages. Socket sells cell upgrades, which may be misinterpreted as cages. (Edit, didn't even see that you asked where she is. She can be found in the same place as Alex after you have completed his Portal Panty content)

Also, on how to get gear, 

If you don't care about not cheating you can use the debug menu. Other than that, just be a sub in the myriad of different ways to do so and you'll get some put on you.

You can always start a fight with the checkpoint guard and surrender to him till you get bondage gear in every slot.