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(5 edits) (+6)

This was so enjoyable! I was eating virtual popcorn as the drama unfolded and the "scandal" a-stirred. How this VN is able to captivate attention, while also retaining it without the use of sound and music, speaks—ahem—volumes to the quality of storytelling. I advise a bit more copyediting, though, since there are small bouts of tense shift here and there, and this is not in reference to flashbacks or when one is reminiscing. There are sometimes these weird spaces between sentences, too (or perhaps the Mac version of the game, I'm not sure). So it'd be like, Friendship ended with Linfield.    Now Worthington is my friend, instead of, Friendship ended with Linfield. Now Worthington is my friendOh look, a summation of my playthrough.

Outside of these two things, though, there isn't much I have yet to suggest. The atmosphere and mannerisms of this VN befit the setting, as they do the genre, and I'm looking forward to what's to come. I do have a question: is the game to split off into three different routes per suitor, or will it be one big story with some branching, depending on which suitor you pursue (so the storyline will be the same upon replay, but with different small moments if one was to pursue another suitor)? 

Another question, sillier and semi-serious, but also more important: will we ever get to meet James?

Some things I especially enjoyed in the demo were as followed (this delves into spoilers):

1) Maman and the bigamy debacle. When Maman finally breaks down after Emily's visit, the sprites and expressions used for her + the timing really hammer in the direness of the situation and how much guilt Maman feels. It's intense, as it is saddening, and it just floors me how well the visuals are used to land the necessary impact. I don't think I'll be able to handle the scene when sound is added.

2) Worthington. Middle-aged men (or one approaching it) aren't usually my type, but this game didn't take long to convince me otherwise. There's a delicacy in which he's written and the mutual respect + friendship he shares with Miss Fernside, as well as the honorable way he conducts himself, makes him so, very attractive and their relationship very appealing. I'm also a huge sucker for the marriage of convenience trope, whoops.   

3) Emily. Oh, she infuriates me, but I love the complexity in which she regards Miss Fernside and how Miss Fernside regards her, even after the betrayal. It punctuates how deep their friendship was, and why the betrayal hurts so much. Brilliant, and I honestly can't wait to see how their relationship gets amended—if it gets amended, that is. 

That's all I have for now, but I can't wait for the updated demo and the kickstarter to run! Best of luck and thank you so much for sharing your baby. <3

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Thank you so much for this! I love hearing the specific things you enjoyed . Thanks for so warmly receiving our “baby” 

As to the tense shifts and weird spacing, let me check with CrowOfWhimsy about that. 

It’s more like a big story with some branching but there are certain choices that will make the story have a bigger “branch” as it were.

As to your other question I will let that remain a mystery for now. 😉

Thanks again for playing and for your gracious feedback!

~CoffeeCat

(1 edit) (+1)

DramaJustCalled, 

Thanks again for brining the spacing issue to our attention. We have an update coming up later, with the sound effects, which will also have the corrected spacing. 

~CoffeeCat

Of course! I'm glad to be of assistance, and can't wait to see what you guys bring to the table with this next update! Thank you for answering my previous post, too. <3

Stay in good health and good look with the updated demo!