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SPOILER ALERT


This was a cute story, but there's some stuff I think could be improved on to make it even better. The Engrish breaks the immersion really bad, and some of the choices don't make much sense (why was it bad to go back for the backpack? Why do I even need the backpack? Right or left at the ending? etc etc.). The biggest problem I had was how the ending just came out of nowhere. I'm the last person who should complain about a dead protagonist, but it was so sudden it was hard to be sad about it. It was more of a "Wait, wut?" and less of a "No, my worst fears have been realized!". A little foreshadowing would go a long way to making sure the ending breaks the player's feels with maximum impact.