I wish I could say that I went through something similar to make sense that I felt so much. I had two boyfriends in my life, the first we had a really friendly breakup and the second I am still dating for about 5 years, my oldest friend is my neighbor so we still have contact even though much less when we were children (my fault for basically being a socially disabled person haha). So I really found myself thinking "why did it hurt me so much? Am I missing something? I went through something like this and didn't notice?" I hope it's just my good side wanting a happy ending for everyone. Because something that made me cry (a person who basically just shed tears because of dead people) has to have a reason.