my critiques to the creator(s) and thanks in advance:
you guys have been working well in your demo, keep it going at your own pace.
I will mentally support this Visual Novel Game, because i see this game content are done well, here is some feedback to help you in the future game development updates:
+you set up the tone just right for a misadventure and romantic themes, i want to see more development progress.
Stick with what you guys have so far and build it and make the story themes firm and work out any bumps you feel are challenging.
and with a few suggestions,
keep mastering the "voice" and attitude of the main character (the player), the voice of the character is good and keep creating the tone and the personality of the player. Do this to all your characters' aspects of their character development.
now to sentencing cleaning:
"A sweater...my laptop, which I took out of the bag to take with me to my seat before throwing myself into my own seat, letting out a loud sigh of relief."
you could proofread and make it read it less clunky, as:
"...my laptop, which I took out of my bag before throwing myself into my own seat, letting out a loud sigh of relief."
in That example, you can avoid using the same words too many times in sentence and make it simple and smooth context sentence, and best part take your time smoothing out words and not be too repetitive.
+ ambience noise or sounds: i like how you use the choice of sounds for certain background context in the airport and airplane scenes, such as people in airport, emergency or sense of danger, and sounds of heavy movement, and slowly drowning into the sea!