This was a lovely character piece! Though it felt a little slow at times, overall you definitely kept my interst with details in the dialog. The story had a very grounded, real feeling to it too... I especially liked when Max tried to get Lyra into animal crossing.
Also, I found it really interesting how Max and Lyra are both lonely and struggling with their passions/professions, but express it in such different ways. They truly are perfect for each other and have wonderful chemistry <3
The only small thing I'd suggest is to be on the lookout for Max describing someting about Lyra using the specific phrases "cute or "heart a flutter" . I noticed this was repeated quite a few times throughout, to the point where it started to feel repetitive and flat. Max is extremely observant from what I encountered, so I'm sure she'd pick up on more details about Lyra than just her overall "cuteness" :) I'm sure swapping out the cute descriptive with some specific details that Max notices in each of these encounters will bring the story and relationship to a whole new level.
Really well done with this project! Keep up the good work!
-Sasha
Viewing post in Elated Sorrow jam comments
Hello! Thanks so much for playing and leaving some feedback. I'm really glad you enjoyed the story and the characters overall. <3
Thanks for the suggestion. I was sleep-deprived when I posted and didn't read over the whole thing...so I will need to go back at some point and fix that. Thanks for pointing it out!