As I have mentioned, more than once, I am saying that it is overwritten. Any writing class will tell you that exposition and monologues should be kept to a minimum. It isn't a Shakespearean play. For a writer, you seem unable to read what's actually written. I have no qualms against the message, nor did I write as such. I even double-checked all my messages to confirm whether if any of them were confusing or vague, but it wasn't.
I'm specifically saying that your writing pulls the player out of the story. You can't use the defence of "It's a freaking porn game", but then defend the writing and that you've heard largely praise. Those are polar opposite arguments, claiming the quality of writing doesn't matter but then saying people actually liked the quality of writing to defend it. Just go onto the internet and look up "trim the fat in writing". It doesn't fix the dialogue feeling unnatural, but it will at least help shorten it up so it's more concise.