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bingus2 years ago

https://undragoncolorado.itch.io/banana-break-in

Our protagonist is an ordinary guy who just wants to get by in life. One day, he receives a knock at the door to meet a cartoon banana wielding an ak-47 demanding some wine and candles. Our protag has to deal with the maniac banana/seduce it/be turned into meat smoothie!

I'd like feedback on: Anything, writing would be appreciated though

I need help on: Certain music files (made with Garageband) would not make sounds when coded in (even if the software interpreted it as working normal).

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DustoTail2 years ago(+1)

If its writing, though im no experts, I think there could have been some intro for the characters. Can be some backstory, some traits, anything to help the player relate to or remember with (also visual wise). The story was basically too abrupt for me, so I was basically spamming the next button.

Personally for me, for audio and visuals, it feels as if theres no consistency (cartoon style in dialogue, creepypasta in the back, cheerful music, and weird jokes from banana). Although there is a style where different style mixed together to create unique experience, its kinda hard to pull off. If its intentional then nice that you tried making it work.

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awaveringspeck2 years ago

This art is great! I agree with DustoTail that the story is a bit abrupt. I would add that the player character has only the basest reason to stay in this situation (the gun), and would, I imagine, be looking for a way to get out. Maybe pretending to drink the wine, attempting to overpower the banana and flee early on. We need more of a reason for them to go along. Maybe more choices would help. We're only two at the very end, and one of them has no bearing on the story. I think making this more of a conversation where you as the character get to try and talk the banana down would be more interesting and believable.

Hope that helps!

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bingus2 years ago

Yeah, the reason it’s rather clunky is because of rushing issues. We pretty much have the full plot planned out, just need to make it fit in.

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AnderGroundSoft2 years ago

Hey! The premise sounds good, definitely will try it out when I have time.

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