Thanks for the feedback! I do need some work on the midi, and I'll look into how to add pedal on the piano (I mostly just play live music, so I'm trying to get into making music via midi).
Regarding your other point I was going for some dissonance with a leading note (though it might not have worked). The new motifs in that section were adapted from an old idea I had for a song like this, and might not have translated well. Thanks again for the tips!