thank you! i was trying it out and apparently it's not necessary to let R speak for themself but you can't reveal the attempt to Kham
I was also trying it out and yes, it seems crucial that you don't reveal the attempt to Kham as well as to the nobility.
Some of decisions that don't seem to be much relevant:
You may move the prisoner if you want to, it still worked for me
Whether you are straightforward or not when asking about the flower
Standing on top of the stairs when meeting Mirs or staying on equal ground
Shouting QUIET or not at the party (but you do need to support the artists)