I'm sorry he's being a stubborn jerk and no, you didn't make the wrong choice you did the best with the information you were given.
If he hid himself and parts of who he is/how he acted that is on him, not you.
I will say either nip it in the bud and set your foot down now or it does get worse. People coddled by their parents wont change unless they want to, and if it's too comfortable for him.. welp he might be a lost cause.
Sadly the keeping your distance and giving strict boundaries is all you can overall do, and hopefully he'll realize how badly he screwed up. The will to change and keep change has to be from him/inside him though, alas.
It's also part of why my mom and one of her exes broke up, he was so complacent just living in his parents' place because "Well I make some money and when they die the house is going to me anyway, so why should I move out?" among other reasons.
Def do your best to protect you and don't get swept up in it all, we all care for and are rooting for you and you deserve to be treated wonderfully, not minimized and ignored.
Also if he keeps up the "it's unimportant" bits... try treating something you don't care for but he does the same way and turn it around on him and be all "And this is what you were doing to me this whole time. It ends now or something else ends." kinda things. ;w;
Thanks, Seraiden *huggs
'The will to change and keep change has to be from him/inside him though, alas.' These words resounded deep within me. Unfortunately, he choose not to change...
I've posted an emergency update just now and when I read your text again today, I've realized how true you are. You speak exactly the same as my mom who said, my husband is the key. If he doesn't want to change or don't realize how badly he screwed up then... prepare for the worse. And the worse happened.
I guess I regret a little. I shouldn't have agreed to live with the in laws in the first place... I thought I can trust him. I thought he can talk with his mom when she becomes too much but... oh well, what happened already happened...
Still, I'd like to thank you for being here for me, Seraiden :')
xoxo,
SweetChiel
Of course, I'm sometimes to brain stressed/potato blob to think of responses, but I try to always read your updates.
Also, as someone who's been in a toxic and starting off emotionally abusive relationship(it didn't get physical til after I had m y kid) I don't wish that on anyone, and it sucks how they can make us internalize it and think the weight should be all on us when no, relationships are mutual and both sides need to be willing to do some lifting to make them work. If one side's carrying it all it just makes you hurt and collapse, in one way or another. :<