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These are really cool! You said that the best feedback for you would be to see what you're aiming at, (0:39 in Under the Mountains Dark and Tall). I like this part a lot! Something that I personally don't like is that the song develops very slowly, and to me never becomes "warlike". Its more a sad slow song, but from what I can tell its not what you envisioned. I think the main reason I interpret it like this is because it sounds like the funeral march, with the background instrument on every beat following the chord, and the vocals following a similar pattern to the funeral march, of starting on the 4th beat, long note on the first, more melody on the 4th and then another long note on the next first. Again this works really well in the beginning to build tension in my opinion, but it becomes very sad over extended period of time.

At 1:55 you change it up, and make it more "warlike", but then it goes away again at 2:00. In my opinion to make a song "warlike" you need a melody that is proud, you need an anthem that people can yell when running into battle.

A dumb example is diggy diggy hole. Its not really what you are aiming for, as yours is a lot more vocals based, and very drum light, and also not as happy and slower (yeah I guess it really isnt what you are aiming for), but the chorus is proud (and its about dwarves).

Small nitpick about the drums, making it louder is good, but it might have been better to change the pattern, and have more hits, rather than one louder one.

Either way it still sounds really nice, Im just nitpicking, and if the effect you mean by "warlike" is sad (like aftermath of war) you can disregard most of what I said. Really cool entry!!

(+1)

Thank you! This is incredibly helpful! 

Yep percussion isn't my thing just yet, I've got some work to do on that. I think it can crescendo too, but recording this correctly will take some mastery of drum compression too, since drums get really loud before their timbre changes much.

I would say the beginning of this composition wise was good but failed to fully develop into the picture the beginning paints, would you agree?

I guess the line between funeral march and war march is also a fine one. I.e. the Imperial March is very warlike and is more awe inspiring, and that was based on Chopin's funeral march. But it was sufficiently boisterous to make it menacing rather than heavy.

I love the diggy diggy hole reference too, love that shit.

The additional context to this is that they are preparing to fight people who want something that is rightfully theirs simply because they want all the treasure under the mountain (so, things that Smaug pillaged that never belonged to the Dwarves in the first place), not just the things that were originally theirs. And they were gearing up for war, with only the band of them in the mountains.

So, while there is this heavy, dark context present, I think you are spot on about the energy not building up correctly.

I think whatever tune I end up landing on for Over the Misty Mountains needs to be similarly resolute so that I can be adapted to this to become warlike, and then also be adapted with more resoluteness to Farewell we call. I think the tone also needs more optimism to be appropriate.

I am a sucker for sad/dark/heavy music... lol. There's a good self observation that should also help me communicate.


Anyways, good stuff, super helpful.