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Wow I didn't expect something so in depth but it's very much appreciated for sure!! 

I would admit that I do sometimes over-complicate a melody to a point where the patterns for each phrase will start drifting down their own route..  

I can see that your proposals on the patterns look easier to follow with subtle variations in places to keep it interesting but without straying too far away from the pack. It rhythmically makes sense too. 

Hope you don't mind but I took screen shots of these just so I can refer to them when writing. I'm grateful for this, truly :) 

It was a pleasure. I learn a lot by analyzing the music of others