I love it! We had a similar premise for ours as well but a very different type of game. I love the very advance wars/into the breach art style. Had a good chuckle about several of the emails you wrote as well.
The only suggestion I would make is that the button to close the emails is in the top right corner, which for the webGL player that puts the button covered by the link to your profile/similar games/gmtk rating so I had to full screen it just to start the game. Otherwise, great fun all around with this one!