I was a big fan of your game last year, and I really enjoyed this game as well. There were a few parts of the story writing I feel like could have been improved a little, but nothing stand-out major. I also got a few good laughs, mostly from the visuals, which was great. I liked that not only did this follow a fairly literal interpretation of the theme, but it seemed to also follow the theme figuratively. The serious parts of the story were great as well. I loved the slow realization of what this planet was (though I had first assumed it was just a private game-hunting planet), and I think it was well paced. I noticed the "to be continued...", and I don't know if you're actually planning on continuing this post-jam, but I would be excited to see more of this story. I will say, though, that I felt like the flashback at the end was superfluous, and I think the story would have flowed better without it.
... quack