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It’s a very cool concept and the main story - as far as I understood - is so intriguing. I think the translation of this did the story a disservice because it is confusing, grammatically all over the place and it changes in tonality which is probably not intended, as the main tone seems to be quite sombre and dark. 

Personally, I also am not a fan of the use of the historical video material. Material from public commons movies instead of documentaries would probably achieve the same. But I generally don’t think the game needs it because the story and the other visuals are strong enough on their own. I think I get that they are supposed to represent memories but why would a human being have history channel documentaries as memories and not personal ones? I think it’s the loss not just of humanity but of my/the protagonist’s own personal history and being that I felt was most striking in this story. 

But please, keep on working on this or other stories. As I said, the story at the core of the novel is quite beautiful and terrifying and I enjoyed slowly uncovering the transformation of my protagonist. 

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Thx you very much for the constructive criticism! My english is fairly average, but I couldn't find a good translator so I wrote the text myself. 

I'm preparing a VN outside of the jam and in it I take this issue more seriously🥲

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I truly believe you have everything you need for a great story. The main issue with jams always is that they are so short on time that it's difficult to spend it on the finishing touches and editing. I will follow you to see what's next because your ideas are great.