The writing could have used another read through, as I found there to be many repeating sentiments throughout the dialogue that padded out the experience more then necessary. There's only so many times I can read and see the words moon and blood before it gets repetitive. Likewise, there is dialogue that serves to just be a repeat on what was said just before, making it redundant. Both of these together end up creating a lot of telling, but not a lot of showing.
But hey, you made a visual novel with multiple branches. That's still something to be proud of, just need to edit the script some more.