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(+5)(-1)

I don't see why the first chapter was rewritten, it felt the same to me since the story was largely the same.

The writing was solid, pacing was good for the first chapter, I will say that the plot needs work. Having a power and running away is interesting but weak.

If you had someone evil hunting you down who killed your parents and wants to kill you or enslave you then I can understand, but having a power that's not been explained to be dangerous isn't memorable, being chased by an organization is interesting but the threat of just being put in a facility doesn't have high stakes or emotional impact.

That being said I'm looking forward to the next update, I hope more action, thrill and drama happens.

(+2)

Well, I first wrote Chapter One nearly three years ago, and many core aspects of the worldbuilding changed. Additionally, Chapter Two is going to look very different so it made sense to start with Chapter One. :)

The plot hasn't really had a chance to get off the ground considering it's the first chapter. Hopefully you find it a bit stronger with future updates.

Thanks for playing and taking the time to let me know your thoughts!