Hello! Welcome to Feedback Quest 6! My name's Hythrain, and I'm one of the hosts and streamers for this event! This feedback is being written live on my stream.
I'm a lover of turn based RPGs, even when they feel so generically RPG Maker. So I had fun playing this. However, I also felt like because it's RPG Maker, I should let myself get more specific with things. You also plan on "remaking" this, so I'm more invested in helping you make it better it all regards. Some of this may seem as nitpicking, but I promise it helps to fix things up.
First, I want to know what you're doing to differentiate yourself from other RPG Maker games in terms of gameplay. A prime example of what I mean is in this event: Moonfell. It uses its own distinct art style and makes a UI that doesn't feel like RPG Maker, though you can tell it has RPG Maker roots when you look very closely. It does its own thing to stand out as unique. Its developer also has another RPG Maker game that ALSO feels unique and not at all like RPG Maker. So what are you doing to be unique? If nothing, you need to think in terms of gameplay as well as story for your remake.
Here are a few things I noticed during my playthrough that should also be avoided or addressed in a remake that (I hope) aren't repeats of Moogle's.
1. Eliza gets her next turn much faster when using attack at level one, to the point where she's better off not using magic at all for the first few levels. If someone is intended as a mage, they should benefit by acting as a mage.
2. There are a lot of sounds going on in the first area, with fire burning and sword clashing on top of the music. I would absolutely say you should remove at least one, if not both of those additional sounds as they're just not necessary. If you do add it, make sure it's not too loud either. ideally, you should be able to hear music first and then the sound effects for those consistent ones. If it's one time and short, then it can be louder.
3. One of the first chest items you can get is a Small Sword. It's weaker than the starting weapon for all characters. Just... why? Chests should always be upgrades, unless you've been able to buy better. Speaking of, limit what the first stores can sell instead of giving them everything. This will make more sense later.
4. I was confused when I got my first random battle, since it seemed to be a set battle game. Outside of the world map, it didn't make sense to me to do both outside of boss fights. I'd say you should remove the random battles from in-area places, keeping instead only set battles. You could do random battles on the world map if you really want to, but if you don't then you can more easily control experience gain and thus always have an idea what level the player should be at. This lets you plan boss encounters around whatever skills the characters will have at minimum by then.
5. So while I love when something is more clearly told in the environment, the massive swing between finding the secret staircase and being told the exact ways to go in the maze to save you time just felt widely different. You need to find a balance in this. On one hand, you want something to stand out enough for the player to know it's what they're looking for, which nothing really did for the stairs. For a prime example, you can check LTTP just before the Agahnim. On the other hand, you don't need such an obvious tell as arrows that point the efficient way right when you need them. Instead, what you could do is something more subtle like showing a certain number of tiles in a way that indicates if it's first or second. If this doesn't make sense, let me know and I'll happily make an example image.
6. So when I was trying to buy items from the shops after getting out of the cave (which was also the first time I had bought anything), there were a LOT of different items. There were two swords that had no description to them, but based on power and money scaling they looked to only be upgrades of the previous swords. However, it turned out they were 2H swords. This leads me to a bigger issue of every character being able to equip a lot of similar gear with no uniqueness to them. Not only does this make decisions less meaningful, but it means when you offer a TON of gear options it gets very confusing. Think of it like this: you don't need to have weaker versions of weapons if the player is likely just going to go for the strongest thing. Similarly, when you limit gear you only need to put up what should be the minimum gear baseline for the next area. That way, items moving forward also remain upgrades that may or may not be beaten by items the next time you get the chance to upgrade. This is why I suggested limiting what the first stores can sell.
So those were the things that felt important to address. These will make your area design and your gameplay just a bit more unique. Now this is only just for the gameplay. I also wanted to speak about story, as a hopeful writer myself and absolutely want to help.
At no point did any of the dialogue give any sense of character personality. Like, if you had told me the personalities and behaviours of each character, I would not be able to identify any of that in the dialogue. Every statement and question was very much next on the "let's keep pushing the story" side, which never allows for personality. I think the only thing that ever gave me that sense was when the Queen of Termerkia said their daughter should stay, since it'd be a learning experience. This one line gives a LOT of personality, but whether it's intended or not is another question. It makes her seem as a strict and pissed off type, who has a bit of cruelty to her. If that's your intent, cool. If not, welp, ya done goofed. Overall, because of this matter-of-fact style of talking, it also means the story gets rushed. There's no room for discussion or questioning of things that ultimately don't matter for the sake of the story but should be to be realistic like who the heck is Terence and why was he listening in and trusted so immediately?
As such, if you want me to I would be happy to help you flesh the story more into something far stronger. It'll still be you writing it, but I'll help you work in the personality more. This will make your story stick out more, as well.