Ahhhhh Quamai thank you for this lovely comment and pouring all your thoughts and feelings into this!! It really meant so much to read this! 😭💕 And I'm really happy that you enjoyed (most of) the finale lakdfjad
"It felt like it was actually my life, like I was the one going through it all" --> LDKJFALDSKFAJD??? Somehow this really made me tear up. This really touched me sob
And thank you for all the wonderfully kind words about the art especially??? It's also so weird even for me to go back and look at some of the older stuff because my art feels like it's come such a long way. But also hearing anyone say they actually like the art always touches me so much as to this day it remains one of the things I feel the most vulnerable about (and is also what will likely always be one of the biggest factors in why people wouldn't to play this game to be honest lkadjfas) So truly thank you so much for saying such kind things. And about the cinematography and such too!! I feel like I put my whole body and soul into those cutscenes GODDDDDD. They take so long 🤣 Especially since Ren'Py doesn't have any kind of built-in easy way to handle animation so it ends up being me just watching the scene over and over and over and adding one new CG at a time and carefully trying to guess and tweak the right amount of seconds to show it then watching it again from the beginning again and again LKDJFADA It's a very laborious process. But I'm always really happy with the results and I couldn't imagine not having some of these scenes be cutscenes as I just don't think they could have the same impact.
Ahhhh I'm happy you liked all the different LI route scenes! I really wanted to ensure they got across the different dynamics of the relationships. Not only the special cabin scenes but also the epilogues. It's one of my favorite parts about the different pairings to be honest, how different they all feel, how different Iggy acts with all of them, etc. They all bring out different sides of Iggy in a way. And it really shapes the core of the different relationships. And I was really hoping that I'd be able to show all of that in their unique scenes and that each one would feel "earned" in a way, so hearing that makes me really teary-eyed!
"it was because the characters themselves didn't adress it yet" --> sob... yeah.... that was a big part of what I was going for. The fact that Bucks was already kind of the odd one out, not only because she's younger than them, but also she's not included in the "love square." And kids growing up are self-centered, they tend to think mostly about themselves, so with the complicated dynamics of the love square four trying to figure themselves out and their complex feelings for each other, they don't even think to wonder about the way they're treating Bucks and whether or not they're being cruel to her in a different way. Which then helped reflect part of the structure of the entire story itself, with the love square four still completely focused on each other for the first four arcs and forgetting about who started the entire mess and who they were looking for to begin with, etc.
Sob you didn't need to strikethrough all your thoughts about the ending 💦 To be honest I pretty much expected there would be people that wouldn't vibe all the way with the direction I decided to go there. But I also knew that it didn't matter HOW I ended it, there would be people who didn't like it. Which was part of why it felt like such pressure in general. There was no one way to end this that would make everyone perfectly happy and I knew that. So in the end I just needed to go with what I felt personally was right for the story. But that doesn't mean people who don't like that direction aren't valid and can't have their own conflicting thoughts about it. So don't feel like you need to not think that or something if you just didn't like that part 💦
OC didn't actually have anything to do with my decision to go that way. I knew ever since I came up with the idea of the loops that that was how I was going to end it, since I already knew that it was Iggy's childhood wish that caused the loops and so it made sense in my head that once the loops were stopped they would go back to where the loops began. OC just helped me think through a lot more about where each of the chars would be and their lives in that reset timeline, which then made it easier for me to write the different epilogues. (Well, the neutral ones at least LKDJFADS though it still did help me to have somewhat of a base even for the different LI-focused ones.) Actually way back when I started I thought I would end the game right after the final forest scene and that would just be it. No follow-ups or epilogues or anything. THAT WOULD HAVE REALLY SUCKED LMAO. But through the years working on it, the idea of that abruptness began really putting me off, so it slowly expanded in a few different ways until it finally fully evolved into what I eventually would write as the epilogues.
For me, I think I decided to go with the "reset" for 3 main reasons, first of which was just because in my head it made the most sense with the lore. Destroying each wish destroyed the result of that wish. Orlam's wish for a family that loved him getting destroyed destroyed the rabbits. Bucks's wish for tomatoes getting destroyed destroyed the little tomato guys. And all the other wishes, too. And the result of Iggy's childhood wish was... Iggy's life itself in a way. Because the moment after he wished that, the wish became this veil over his life (and formed the loops). So destroying that wish destroyed the life that had formed because of that wish. The second reason was perhaps my gift to Iggy himself. Wanting to free him from the shackles of that wish, since it had influenced so much of his life (and his friends', for instance, it was what kept all of them so physically close). I wanted to gift him a chance to live his life without that I guess. And the last reason is perhaps the most selfish and it's somewhat of a gift to myself. I don't have the chance to have a reset. To go back and figure things out about myself earlier on to have the potential to be happier. And I'm too much of an anxious mess scared of change to do anything about it now after all these years, so I feel a bit trapped. But I can at least give a gift to these chars that have become so important to me, especially Iggy, who has so much of me in him, and give them a chance that I can never have. And in that way it feels like a gift to myself since these chars are such a big part of my life. LDKJFASD THAT GOT A BIT SAD. But. I think that kinda explains my whole mindset of not only why I had originally planned for that ending but also why I continued with that plan even when I had reached the end (even if I ended up greatly expanding on it).
HAVING SAID ALL THAT. That doesn't mean you need to agree with it. Or that anyone needs to. Because we can all have different opinions on things and feel like things should have happened differently. So I don't mind at all if you think that it was a bad way to handle it at the end. I can really only stand behind how I did it for myself. The same as any creator can only do when they create (and especially complete) something. 🤣 No matter what, though, I am happy to hear your thoughts about it!!
"GIDGET REALLY JUST KISSED EVERYONE. THAT'S INSANESAADOHDSHSJ???" --> LDKJFASLDKFAD it was very funny to me because I hadn't planned that into Gidget's epilogue at all when I was first trying to piece it together but somehow it just... happened... LOL I just really like thinking about that little group and their dynamics 🤣
Re: the OC question, when I wrote OC, since I knew that the plan was always for the reset, I did always know that OC was technically canon. (At least for the neutral ending.) I just didn't want to say that when I released it because I felt it would have opened up too many potential spoilers/clues for how the game would end. I already had a lot of thoughts running through my head about what each char would be like after the end of the game in the new timeline. Orlam in particular, as I feel like he changes the most. I had a lot of Orlam's general direction figured out already as thinking about a much better "true" version of Orlam made me happier to think about than the subdued lacking-in-confidence Orlam we see pre-Wonderland.
SOB AT ANY RATE. THIS WAS SUCH A LOVELY AND WONDERFUL AND KIND COMMENT. Thank you so so much for taking so much time to think through everything and leave such thoughtful words filled with all of your reactions! It really means to world to read through them, especially since you've been following the game for so long now. And I'm happy that for the most part you were able to enjoy the finale!
"You have made one of the most amazing visual novels of all time, and you should feel nothing but proud of yourself for such an accomplishment." --> LKFDJALSDKFAD THAT IS INCREDIBLY KIND SOB YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE ME CRYYYYYYYY... 😭💕
Thank you again for all of your support!! 🥰