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(1 edit)

It was interesting to see a story that ends with consequences for someone other than the main character. I feel like most of our first thoughts was "how can I make my main character suffer", rather than, "how can my main character cause someone else's consequences?"

The flow was a bit choppy, and the use of caps can be a bit grating, but I think your story had good connectivity none the less.

I'll also soapbox for a second that I'm generally opposed to implied sexual violence as a plot device. You don't directly say that is what happened, but it gives that vibe to me. I think it is used far too often in media and can easily be forgone, especially when it is not based in any specific historical precedent or real-world example. Sexual violence virtually never makes a story better, in my opinion. This didn't impact my ratings of your story! It's just something I wanted to put out there for my fellow writers.

He clairifies that the elf tortured his daughter at one point.  The elf just cut her really bad, didn't sink to that level, but hurting a man's daughter is generally lethal once dad finds out.  Regardless of how you go about doing the hurting.

Sure sure. I think you make that clear. It was where I originally thought you were going, so I just wanted to pontificate while I had the chance and circumstance.